It seems the biggest news this week for Americans is the closing of Hostess . Like more than one person I know, I have raised kids who've never tasted a Hostess product (to my knowledge) and found themselves curious about these soon to be unattainable cake like products.
I offered a one time dispensation, which I imagined would involve on package of Twinkies split between them, not that the small portions would matter because they're so vile, who can finish them?
The kids joyfully relayed this news to The DM, who usually does the grocery shopping. And then I went off to spend the day with one of my internet friends who was visiting the Seattle area.
Not long after I got home, Turbo asked if he could have some Twinkie substitute for dessert? Whaaat? Seems the DM had bought a WHOLE BOX of Little Deathie's Swiss rolls. What is worse, the kids actually wanted seconds. Clearly, I have failed somewhere in my training of their palettes, and will surely die some day of cancer and/or diabetes from eating pure crap once they're adults. My immediate concern, however, was how to get the death cakes out of my house without invoking the ire of my family. After some thought, it seemed there was only one recourse: make them a substitute.
I set out to make a roulade. I used the recipe from KCTS Cooks Chocolate, but this one comes close. Any chocolate cookbook worth the paper it's printed on will have a roualde or buche de noel recipe. I'm filling mine with classic buttercream, but it can be filled with ganache or mousse.
The ingredients list for my cake roll?
eggs
cocoa powder
sugar
cream of tarter
butter
powdered sugar
The ingredients for the death cakes?
Sugar, Corn Syrup, Water, Vegetable(s) Shortening, Soybean(s) Oil Partially Hydrogenated,Cottonseed Oil Partially Hydrogenated, Flour Enriched Bleached, Wheat Flour, Niacin, Iron Reduced, Thiamine Mononitrate (Vitamin B1), Riboflavin (Vitamin B2), Dextrose, Cocoa, Egg(s),Soybean(s) Oil, Color(s), Caramel Color, Red 40, Whey, Leavening, Baking Soda, Sodium Aluminum Phosphate, Emulsifier(s), Sorbitan Monostearate, Polysorbate 60, Mono and Diglycerides, Salt, Sorbic Acid To Preserve Freshness, Soya Lecithin, Flavor(s) Natural & Artificial, Corn Starch
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